Well, This is my first full day of fasting that I am about to complete. I have a headache, but that's my fault because I didn't drink that much water yesterday, but I should be okay in that department today as long as I keep hydrating. Nothing special has happened, but then again I haven't been doing any deep prayer today. I just read my The Hip Hop Church book in the bus that I took to work, but I only read about 10 pages or something like that. I already have that ammonia taste in my mouth. It's kinda cool cause it's sweet and it reminds me that I am fasting... the headache does too though :( haha...
I guess I will continue to update this later...
PS - God, You know why I am fasting. You know the reasons that I am humbling myself in front of You. You know why I have "put on" this sackcloth as David did many a times. Thank You for teaching me this spiritual discipline because I feel as close to you as Jesus must have started to feel while He was fasting. Well, maybe not AS close as JC was to You, but I am getting there and I know that You rejoice in my heart right now. Thank You so much for just being there!! Thank you SOOO much for continuing to make me realize how much I NEED to depend on YOU!!! Thank You for your promises and the people that You have surrounded me with in order to keep me centered on You!! Thank you for my Community (big C). Thank you for our encounter in Victory Outreach this past Sunday!! Thank You because you have thrown my sin as far as the East is from the West!! Thank you for telling me to do this 4 days instead of 3 and giving me a chance to be obedient to You!!! Thank you for speaking to me! Thank You for giving me this job and blessing me by having my dad close to me! Thank you for giving me a time to pray and rest on the bus! Thank You for giving me a job where I can type and bless your name at just about any point that I chose! Thank You for my family! And thank you for the encouragement that my college group is giving me!! Thank You because they see your mercy and they get to experience you through my pain! Bless them God please bless them! Bless my family for never leaving me no matter how much it hurts. Bless my friends for never turning a deaf ear or a cold back to me! Bless them for seeing me as You see me! Bless them for the deep commitment that they have with You! Bless them deeper this year! Reveal yourself SOOO much more to them. DO NOT allow them to grow complacent! Bring them trials to grow them in their faith, closeness, dependence on You!! LORD I ask that you continue to fill me with Your Holy Spirit so that I may pray with Your heart and not mine. I ask You that You listen to my supplications as I pour out my heart to You. I need You in my weakness. I need you to give me spiritual strength AND physical strength to say no when the enemy whispers evil suggestions that grieves your wonderful heart. Let me be in a complete spirit of prayer when I am in public and when I am alone with You! Father please take this headache away unless it is Your way of keeping me in prayer. Please do Your will in my life in the details of the every day as well as the general things that occur around me. Please bless all those that have wronged me. Please bring Sheyla and her family to a place of surrender and truth that can only come from you. Please show them your mercy and forgiveness through me. Please show them tangibly that You are there and that You are real! God please bless them and restore them. Stop their hurt as well as ours. Please be glorified through the mess that we've created. Please bring peace in this chaos. Lord, thank YOU!! Thank you for allowing me to feel you and be with You!! Thank you for teaching me to pray for my brothers and sisters that have wronged me. Thank You for Your promises to me!! Thank You for your reprimand! Thank You for Your punishment because You deem me worthy of it even though I KNOW that I don't even deserve that! I just beg You to work a miracle... THE MIRACLE THAT YOU SAID THAT YOU WOULD DO!!!... and bring honor to my name again. Bring such a deep truth that everyone would KNOW that it was YOU!!! Nothing of me and ALL of YOU!!! LORD I am so excited to continue to fast for YOU and for ME! am SO excited to pray deeply... take me DEEPER!! Take me so deep that I will not ever want to come back down the mountain!!! Make my face glow due to the witnessing of YOUR GLORY!! :) I feel You!! I feel your Spirit dancing with mine as I pray! I see your Spirit smile!! I see you smile Father!!!
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